A glance at my thoughts ...

In order for us not to regret something in life we have to accept things as they are and come to terms with them. In order to come to terms with something one should be able to look at it from a third person perspective. We should be able to see things with a clear head and without any emotion. We should have an impersonal observation of how things are. All this is never easy and requires a lot of perseverance from our part.

But its not impossible. Though as a side effect to this we may loose our capability to feel. Which is both good and bad. When we don't feel, we can keep out the negative emotions such as pain and anger. But so do we keep out happiness and elation. Its possible to keep out the negative and keep the positive. But I haven't succeeded in that yet.

What I have observed is that to be happy for extended period of time, sadness is necessary. OK, it would be great if we can be happy all the time, but then we wouldn't really realize ever that we are happy. We just take it for granted. And maybe get bored of happiness. So if we do feel sad, we understand the value of being happy. So if we try to push away sadness by pushing away emotions, we push away happiness too. But then again pushing away emotions still need not give us peace. We could still feel empty or calm. If we feel empty, we have lost a battle, and we are going to embrace emotions at some point soon. Because we haven't pushed away emotions. We are just drained of them. We just need time for it to be back. If we feel calm, maybe we have found our way of life. But I don't believe any of this is permanent.

Human beings are like chameleons at least where emotions are concerned. They keep changing. They keep phasing. Depending on the twists and turns of life, and what life throws at us, and how we decide to take it, we change - for good or bad. What may seem good to one might not seem good to another. What may be an achievement for one might be a disappointment for another. So what we feel after every decision, every experience, is all how we decide to view it - good or bad. We are capable of seeing good in every action, so are we capable of seeing everything negatively.

I for one believe that good or bad, I am who I am. I believe in taking chances, taking risks, getting hurt, getting drained of emotions, sitting and crying over things I did which turned out bad, then after I had enough crying over it I decide - OK, lets forget it and move on. Then go and do something different, which again might turn out well or might not. We'll never know what will work for us till we give it a chance. And its always a gamble. A large part of the outcome lies not in our hands, but on circumstances, other people, luck, and so on. But not trying just might mean we will never live life, just drag it on. So I like to see life as an obstacle race (oh, I love challenges and obstacle races, and all that ...).

People say when we die we see our whole life flash in front of us ... similarly I believe if we need to get over anything in life, we should be able to view what ever it is we need to get over, from its beginning to the end, and remain undisturbed. Then we are over it. Though I might also think that would mean that that part of us is dead.

By now you can understand that I have a million things running through my head, and just flow from thought to thought when I have time to sit and think. And let me tell you I manage to type only a part of it ... some times my thoughts move too fast for me to capture them here ... I guess I am letting this blog entry a glance into my head ... which I believe is a very confusing one ... let me assure you I am not muddled in my day to day actions ... just in my philosophical thoughts .... and I think I will close the window to my thoughtful and wondering mind for now ...